Forgetting

I could iron clothes in my sleep. This is not something that I necessarily want to brag about, it’s simply a fact of my life. Yes, I am domestically gifted, but there are many tasks that each of us do daily that require little concentration or attention to detail. I'm sure that some are much more important than my household chores, but I use this time to plan my day and beat a few dead horses killed in the days and weeks before.

This morning I used the iron and its hissing steam as white noise while I prioritized my day. I’m no busier than the average person, but most of what I was attempting to pull together today was an exceptionally eclectic and random mix; multiple businesses, volunteer boards and family woes. And then it hit me! A fleeting image of my forgotten homework lying neatly on the dining room table; me, standing in the school lunch line with no money in my pockets, loaded tray in hand; my daughter, standing in front of the school impatiently checking her watch and looking down an empty street. I had forgotten something major…but what?

When it finally hit me I had to smile. What I had allowed to sneak past me was a date that I had actually been trying to forget for quite some time. How long I had been trying to forget is really not as important as the fact that it had finally happened. I had forgotten to be sad on the 10^th anniversary of my brother’s death.

I won’t try to tell you that I hadn’t thought of this date at all in the previous months, but I will add that it had not filled me with the same level of dread that it had before. This was not a date that he and I shared or celebrated, it was an anniversary created when he left. It was almost like adding another birthday, but for all the wrong reasons. We only need one, and I will happily dance on yours again this year as I celebrate your life.